woah [they're beauties]

The Boyfriend List
by Paige

1. Adam (But the wedding was canceled)
2. Patrick S. (But then he moved)
3. Jeffery (But he dated everyone)
4. Jonathan (But we never really talked)
5. Frankie (But we try not to think about it)
6. Kevin (But it was out of pity)
7. Jordan (But we never actually dated)
8. Joey (But it was only from afar and then I gave up)
9. Patrick B. (But he started to hate me when he found out)
10. Mitchel Musso (But his hair got too long)
11. Tony (But then I screwed things up)
12. Zac Efron (But he has a girl friend)

♥♥

why [do you ALWAYS do this to me] ?

uggh.
confusing seems to be the word of my life right now.
so, everyone knows i like this guy.
i mean, hell-oh.
it's obvious.
but, like, i'm not supposed to like him and he's not supposed to like me.
but it seems like the saying is true.
you always want what you can't have.
GO FIGURE.
and to add to it?
i don't even know if i like him.
my feelings are so screwed at the moment.
like, he makes fun of me.
he talks about his girl friend around me, even though he knows it bugs me.
he constantly yells at me for no reason.
and every day i go through the same thing.
he's like, "okay. you're a stupid bitch and i'm blocking you."
so i'm like, "whatever."
because i am so sick of caring.
so then he goes offline/blocks me.
guess what happens two seconds later?
he comes back online waiting for me to go crawling back to him.
then when i don't [because even though it may not seem that way, i'm a really strong girl. emotionally and slightly physically], he comes crawling back to me saying, "well i GUESS i'll be your friend if you WANT."
and so i'm like, "i don't really care either way."
then he says, "oh please. you love me. you couldn't live without me."
HAH.
i totally could.
i think.
i mean, like, if i tried/wanted to, i could.
but he's making everything hard.
so then he decides to twist things saying i'm mad at him for not dumping his girl friend for me after i broke his heart twice.
which i'm not.
it's totally understandable.
sure, i wish he loved me, but i don't expect him to.
i dumped him for stupid reasons twice.
i'm not sure i'd still like someone who did that to me.
anyway.
yeah.
so then we work things out and are friends again until the next night when he does it again.
IT'S JUST SO FRICKING ANNOYING.
i can't stand it anymore.
and poor kara has to deal with me every time.
i love her.
she's the best.
srsly.
i don't even know how i handle myself everyday, let alone my friends who have to deal with it.
so, yeah, i'm thankful for her.
and everyone who has ever cheered me up.
you all are the best.
<3
Paige

paige and kara in [THE THERAPIST]

my best friend;;

(6:40:16 PM) Kara: okay therepy time cuz im bored
(6:40:20 PM) Kara: hows life?
(6:40:20 PM) Paige: ohgod.
(6:40:24 PM) Paige: fine.
(6:40:38 PM) Kara: how does that make you /feel/?
(6:40:48 PM) Paige: fine.
(6:41:18 PM) Kara: you need to open up ~hand gestures~ more.
(6:44:30 PM) Paige: no i don't. -closes hands-
(6:45:17 PM) Kara: yes you do ~opens hands~
(6:45:48 PM) Paige: NO.I.DON'T. -glues kara's hands together with super glue-
(6:46:21 PM) Kara: YES YOU DO. ~bites paiges hands apart
(6:46:23 PM) Kara: ~
(6:46:31 PM) Paige: ouch !
(6:46:35 PM) Paige: i don't like you.
(6:46:49 PM) Paige: i'm outta here. -stomps out of therapist's office-
(6:46:58 PM) Kara: you /superglued/ my hnds
(6:47:02 PM) Kara: hands*
(6:47:12 PM) Paige: -calls from outside- YOUR PROBLEM.
(6:47:36 PM) Kara: ~calls security~ YOURE PROBLEM NOW
(6:47:56 PM) Paige: -runs awa- YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE, COPPERS.
(6:48:02 PM) Paige: [i saw that in a movie]
(6:48:15 PM) Kara: ~brings out the dogs~ YOU WANNA BET??
(6:48:30 PM) Paige: -pets dogs- awwh. they're sweet. (:
(6:49:43 PM) Kara: okay, shes distracted...SIC!! [or however you spell it.]
(6:49:53 PM) Kara: [im having typing issues]
(6:49:58 PM) Paige: [i see]
(6:50:23 PM) Paige: -runs away from dogs and into house-. phew -wips forehead like there's sweat on it but there isn't.-
(6:50:59 PM) Kara: ~brings out the bombers~
(6:51:07 PM) Kara: [i sound like tony]
(6:51:20 PM) Paige: [did you realize that therapist is like the rapist without spaces?!?!?!?!]
(6:51:26 PM) Paige: ahhh !
(6:51:38 PM) Paige: -sacrifices self- i give up.
(6:51:52 PM) Kara: hahahahahahaha
(6:51:58 PM) Kara: thats hilarioysss
(6:52:02 PM) Paige: yeah.
(6:53:14 PM) Paige: so are we through with this therapist story?
(6:53:53 PM) Kara: i suppose
(6:53:59 PM) Paige: good.
(6:54:04 PM) Paige: cause it's going in my blog.
(6:54:20 PM) Kara: mine too
(6:54:26 PM) Paige: xDD
(6:54:32 PM) Kara: the rapist comment went ito my bi
(6:54:40 PM) Paige: nice.
(6:54:46 PM) Kara: yup

rock [awn]

party like a rock star

my best friend [(intheworld)]

our love?
it exists;;;



(8:43:37 PM) Paige: i'm looking at a list of pet names to call you bf/gf.
(8:43:48 PM) Paige: so i'ma list my names for you, my boy friend...
(8:43:49 PM) Kara: hahaha, i love that one
(8:43:50 PM) Paige: Bunbuns
(8:43:56 PM) Kara: hahahahahahah
(8:44:04 PM) Paige: CheekyMonkey
(8:44:10 PM) Paige: CheeseBall
(8:44:16 PM) Paige: ChunkyBunny
(8:44:25 PM) Paige: Chicken
[that's you. xDDD]
(8:44:31 PM) Kara: hahahhahahahahaha
(8:44:50 PM) Paige: Doobie
(8:44:57 PM) Paige: Dork
xD
(8:45:01 PM) Kara: ~is literally lol-ing and is prepared for her mom to be like "wtf?"~
(8:45:08 PM) Paige: ahahahaha/
(8:45:14 PM) Paige: Egghead
(8:45:23 PM) Paige: Fluffer-Nutter
(8:45:28 PM) Paige: Frou-Frou
(8:45:35 PM) Paige: GangstaBaby
(8:45:41 PM) Kara: i like that 1
(8:45:46 PM) Paige: HandsomeBabyBoo
(8:45:58 PM) Paige: Huggalump
(8:46:09 PM) Paige: okay -pauses writing funny names that make kara lol-
...
(8:48:59 PM) Paige: -goes back to posting names i'ma call kara on the field trip tomorrow that will make her laugh in the middle of a quiet museum.-
(8:49:11 PM) Paige: Jujube
(8:49:19 PM) Kara: thanks
(8:49:33 PM) Paige: LadyKiller
[that makes you sound like you smell bad.]
(8:49:37 PM) Paige: xDD
(8:49:50 PM) Paige: Lumlums
(8:50:00 PM) Kara: im making one for us cuz im breaking up with you
(8:50:01 PM) Paige: Monkey
(8:50:04 PM) Paige: =ooo
(8:50:07 PM) Paige: noooooo !
(8:50:13 PM) Paige: I CAN CHANGE ! -clings-
(8:50:29 PM) Paige: don't leave me, Mookie-PookieBear
(8:50:31 PM) Paige: <3
(8:50:45 PM) Paige: /Muffinhead
(8:50:54 PM) Paige: /Muggles
(8:51:08 PM) Paige: /NumNums
(8:52:31 PM) Paige: /PickleHead
(8:52:39 PM) Paige: /PicklePie
(8:52:39 PM) Kara: Dear Paige,

I'm terribly sorry I had to do this through a letter, this might save our asses and make me look better, now that we're both sleeping with other people.. This note will be the last memory
(8:52:48 PM) Kara: lookin back.. Don't let it get you all upset inside, It was completely your fault, no doubt about it. It is because of your history of farting problems that keep me from being even remotely interested in continuing this relationship with you.
(8:52:58 PM) Kara: You'd be much better off finding a person that can deal with fun way you Never shaved your arm pits. I might miss certain things about you such as the time you came to my house and stunk the bathroom up
(8:53:06 PM) Kara: I'm glad this is done and we're going separate directions for good. I think you'll find someone to have an unhealthy relationship based on physical attraction. And hopefully we will be incredibly far away.

Have a nice life,Kara
(8:53:13 PM) Paige: -laughs through her tears-
(8:53:18 PM) Kara: lol
(8:53:30 PM) Paige: but i still love you, my Poopsie
(8:53:33 PM) Paige: (:
(8:53:46 PM) Paige: /Punkin´butt
(8:53:58 PM) Paige: /SchmooookyPookiePooo
(8:54:06 PM) Paige: /Schmoopy
(8:54:22 PM) Paige: /Shmoops
(8:54:30 PM) Paige: /ShoogieWoogie
(8:54:31 PM) Kara: TwinkleToes
(8:54:39 PM) Kara: WinkyDink
(8:54:50 PM) Kara: TootsieWootsy
(8:55:00 PM) Kara: Sweetthang
(8:55:05 PM) Paige: SweetiepieFacecake
(8:55:08 PM) Kara: Tator-Tot
(8:55:27 PM) Kara: LoveBoodle
(8:55:32 PM) Paige: Yummers !
i pick that. you are now call yummers. end of story. (:
(8:55:41 PM) Kara: Lambchop
(8:55:56 PM) Kara: and ill call you tator -tot
(8:56:05 PM) Paige: hahahahahaha. okay, yummers. (:
(8:56:16 PM) Kara: okay...jeremy
(8:56:26 PM) Paige: xDDDDDDDD
(8:56:30 PM) Paige: i'm srsly laughing.
(8:56:33 PM) Paige: out loud.
(8:56:39 PM) Kara: hahahaha
(8:59:03 PM) Paige: i'm making a blog post just for this conversation.
(8:59:05 PM) Paige: xDD
(8:59:12 PM) Kara: ooohkay!!


<3 BFF (:

don't try to label me (HYPOCRITE)

hi there. (:
i really hate fake smiles. -grins widely-
but i end up using them all the time anyway. -smile drops-
i really wanted to post here for a few reasons.
1. i was bored and this is one way i use to get rid of my boredom.
2. i got a lot to say to you. yeah i got a lot to sayyyyy.... -sings- anyway. no. i really do have some stuff to say.
starting with people and ending with people.
well, all my shit is about people.
okayso.
people always tell me things i don't want to hear, and they know it too.
because they'll start their sentences with, "i'm not supposed to tell you but..." or "you probably won't want to hear this but..."
THEN DON'T TELL ME.
i can live my life perfectly happy without knowing some of the crap people have told me.
do i really care what my ex is doing with other girls?
do i really care if my best friend talked shit about me?
i'll let you think about that
...
...
...
correct answer; NO.
i prefer to live my life in a perfect fairytale, so let me live that way.
kay?
thank.you.
next topic; perfection.
our society is so stupid.
all models are perfect, as well as singers and actresses.
you're either fat and beautiful or skinny and beautiful.
there is no normal.
normal is not beautiful, normal is just normal.
and so, i figure, normal is where i fit in.
and i don't want to be normal, or fat.
i want to be skinny, but doesn't everyone?
i just can't be happy with myself and it bugs me.
moving along.
BRITNEY SPEARS IS FUCKING ANNOYING AND NO ONE LIKES HER SO SHE SHOULD GET THE HELL OUT OF THE NEWS.
had to get that out, that's all. (:
moving on again...
boys?
it's stupid how they make fun of us because their whole life is one big PMS.
at least they only have to deal with us once a month.
we have to deal with them every day.
who has it easy now?
NEXT.
hypocritcal drama whore
[hdw]
it sounds like a disease.
but, then again, it pretty much acts like one too.
you my be a HDW if...
1. you enjoy talking about people behind their backs.
2. spreading rumors is considered a hobby for you.
3. you have more enemies than friends.
4. you hate it when you hear a rumor about yourself, true or false.
if two or more of these apply to you, you may just have HDW syndrome.
please get yourself a therapist, thanks. (:
LAST THING.
ohwait.
i s'pose i'm done.
comment/hate me/love me.
doesn't make a difference.
hearts&fakesmiles,
Paige

{{you're}} on my heart just like a {{tatoo}}

two posts in one day !
goes to show how utterly repulsive my life is.
so apparently i've stated that someone was a bitch in my blog.
yet, i haven't said that word once.
go ahead.
look for yourself.
so me & kara are pissed at this girl because she spreads rumors about everyone else, but hates it when people lie about her.
she's what we like to call a "hypocritical drama whore".
-nodnod-
learn it.
'cause she is.
and so this is cleared up right here in bold lettering;;
ERIKA IS NOT NOR WILL EVER BE A BITCH.
until she does something to me that actually qualifies as "bitchy".
because, at the moment, she has done zip-o to me.
in fact, we never really talked that much.
why i would call someone i barely know a bitch is beyond me.
it's really upsetting that something i never said that was only a few words anyway has escalated.
it frankly just pisses me off that people who were once your best friends turn on you so quickly.
hm.
who knew?
--
Paige

well that's [ree.tard.ed.]

let me tell you what happened to me on friday.
it has turned me off of drama forever.
not that i liked it before...
ah ! anyway...
bridgette* walked up to me after lunch and was like, "hey paige, can i ask you something?"
this left me confused.
you see, i never /ever/ talk to bridgette. in fact, all my friends hate her, and i've heard she hates me too so... -shrugs-
but i said, "sure".
so she asked me if i called tanya* a bitch.
so then i was like WTF?
but i didn't say that.
i said, "what? no. i never said anything like that."
so then she goes, "well that's what addie* said."
which made zero sense to me.
i never talk to addie online, and i seldom talk to her in person.
in fact; i don't talk to anyone online except kara. and occasionally kat, michelle, and tony.
so by this point, i was mad, but i didn't let it show. i wasn't about to explode in front of anyone.
so i'm like, "i never talk to addie. and i never said anything bad about tanya. i think she's a perfectly good person."
which is true.
and everyone thinks i hate her guts because she's dating my ex who everyone thinks i like, but i really kinda don't anymore.
but i hate it when people hate people just because they're dating who the other person likes.
i'm sorry; it's immature.
so i'm happy for both of them.
i'd be more happy if she took part in the relationship; but that's a whole different story.
but is that drama retarded or what?
oh.
after i explained, bridgette just kinda shrugged and walked away.
and later my friends told me that bridgette was looking for my e-mail and screen name.
it's all too weird, if you ask me.
so now there's a rumor going around about me that i clearly stated was /nawt/ true.
but i'll deal with it.
because i don't care what people think about me anyway.
<3 Paige




* names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.
IM me if you'd like me to clarify their identities. (:

say {[i don't wanna be in love]}

well..
i figured instead of answering everyone IMing me asking what's wrong, i'd just post a blog so i only have to say this once.
i don't want to say it at all, but i figure that no one should be left in the dark...
i'm so sick of this shit that tony's giving me. [AND I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT I USED HIS REAL NAME]
let's start with last night;
we were talking normally and stuff, then all of a sudden, he's like, "i can't talk to you anymore. goodbye forever."
so i'm left thinking "WTF?"
so i beg&beg&beg him not to leave, and he finally gives in.
then he tells me how much he loves me and is so sorry.
so i fall for his sweet lies again.
which was obviously a mistakes because TODAY...
we were talking normally again.
then we got into a conversation about how he barely loves me anymore so we can be friends.
so i'm like, "cool."
then he decides he has to go because he can't talk to me for long periods of time, or something crappy like that.
so i'm like, "okay?"
then we got into a fight.
it's vague to me what actually took place, i was too shocked, i believe.
anyway.
now he's blocking me on everything he has.
and you know what?
i don't care.
i think i'm over him.
well.
i can say that, but i know that the second he comes crawling back to me, i'll love him again.
i'm strange like that.
but, this is a huge step.
because now i think i can live life without him.
so i'm moving along. (:
and i'm gonna go watch videos of me, kara & sabrina at my birthday party.
because they always make me smile. (:
love&feel-better hugs,
Paige

why should i care? [poemific]

Mistakes & Heart Aches

I hate you.
I love you.
Your blue eyes,
Your sweet lies.
Our pointless talks,
The long walks.
Your strong hug,
My addictive drug.
That first kiss,
Something I’ll definitely miss.
Basketball games,
Old flames.
We’ve been through it all,
And never thought we’d fall.

The break-up.
The make-up.
One mistake,
Two hearts ache.
He finds a new girl,
Their relationship she tries to unfurl.
Nothing ever works,
A secret seems to lurk.
He says he still loves her,
And misses everything they were.
She foolishly believes him,
And begins to cater to his every whim.
But then he gives up again,
Scribbles out her name in dark black pen.
She’s left with a broken heart,
A ruined work of art.

Now they’re left chasing each other,
Both left believing another.
His friends think she’s playing a game,
Hers say the same.
They both know it wasn’t supposed to end this way,
But what do you do when you have no say?

love&hugs,
Paige